I with could see and hear quite a regular thing that we find very often to us when we communicate.
Many of us believes we can not say certain things, to highlight his belief, because the person who will receive the message, will take it badly, does not agree, will laugh ...
There are two points we can easily see:
- A message, an idea, or opinion, all that remains is a sense that we employees.
- The receiver is not in our head and not the experience we have, so that the lexicon and the values that we release will be different ...
This gives us, dialogues in which we do not put forward our thoughts, our disagreements, for fear of being in conflict ... and looking further for fear of not being "appreciated" by the other.
is one of our social conventions that will be integrated into a group, or try to put people on our side.
For this, there may be different methods:
- Playing on the handling and "domination" of the other through a kind of afraid of ridicule, rejection, verbal abuse ...
- Playing on the emotions of the other, often those who do not want to bother, put themselves back and plays the role of victim. Which requires attention on them.
(this remains a very succinct categorization).
It is important to put in mind that what we propose in the dialogue, can be accepted or refused. This can create emotions that are going to react.
At no time, we are not responsible for the experience of the person, and what we say what we think is in our sphere of thought.
person who reacts, does not govern against us but against a set of elements linked to his life and his beliefs.
This is not the disagreements that will make the person does not like you or more, are his perceptions of what will be said that will create trouble.
So try to say what you think, and remember that this is not you who will not be loved or accepted, it's just the exchange as a whole, and it is depersonalized ...
Take care of yourself, and Hocine
pank
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